FOR DADS AND MOMS

This article is about a wonderful gift a father can give his child. It's also a wonderful gift a mother can give her child. Parents model adult behavior for their children. They also model what loving someone is about: caring, consideration, communication, tolerance. If a child doesn't have good role models the child won't know what is acceptable and unacceptable, won't have anything to fall back on when navigating a relationship that, like all relationships, hits a difficult patch. Read this article for insight and  inspiration. http://www.families.com/blog/the-best-gift-a-father-can-give-his-child  

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INFORMATIVE ARTICLE FOR PARENTS of TEENAGE GIRLS

In general parents of teenage girls report frustration at the seemingly unpredictable and wildly fluctuating emotions their daughters exhibit. Sometimes the behavior is extreme and sometimes mild but most parents of teen girls will say that their daughters, in contrast to their teenage boys, spend a lot more time involved with emotional interactions with peers, girlfriends, boyfriends, what to do, what not to do, the dreadful breakup or the nerve of that girl trying to act like she's better and so on. And when a parent attempts to talk to their daughter about something seemingly dramatic taking place in her life, to help her make sense of it all or work through something, the parent is often rejected or told that "they just don't get it," exit to the bedroom, shut door, play loud music, talk on phone, ignore parent as much as possible until crisis passes at which point daughter who seemed to be on the brink of despair emerges smiling and talkative until the next time. This scientific article explains what's going on with the developing girl's brain during adolescence: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2009/brain-emotion-circuit-sparks-as-teen-girls-size-up-peers.shtml

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NOT A GOOD DATE?

Dear MJ, My friend likes to take the bus trips to Reno for a fun time out. We live in an assisted living complex so I like to get out too but I don’t always like to go on bus trips, especially when it’s always to go gambling and have a few drinks. I wouldn’t mind going with her sometimes but when I ask her to do other things with me she says she’s too busy. Is she really my friend? What should I do? Sincerely, Not a Good Date Dear Not a Good Date, You’re probably are a good date, and I bet you’re a lot of fun to be with on the bus trips, otherwise she wouldn’t keep asking you. In any friendship, the hardest thing to do is talk about things that might make you or the other person uncomfortable. You need to change the way you think about “uncomfortable situations” and realize that “fact finding” conversations don’t have to be uncomfortable at all. First, it’s important that you come up with more than one thing you like to do so you can offer your friend a “menu” of other fun activities. Maybe you like longer trips...

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CHILDREN DON’T NEED PARENTS FOR FRIENDS, THEY NEED PARENTS

It's nice and even good when parents and children get along and enjoy each other. Unfortunately, sometimes it's a parents responsibility to take care of their child even if the child is angry and won't speak to the parent or locks him or herself away in their bedroom for awhile, when the parent parents. For instance, if your child asks if they can go spend the night with a friend, do you call the friend's parents to see if there's going to be an adult in the house? NO? Hmmmm, no wonder so many kids can tell me all about the parties with the alcohol and drugs they consumed over the weekend. Not your child? Don't be so fast to decide that. I work with kids from good families with loving, hard working parents. Children are children. They are not adults even when they are throwing a fit to convince us they are. Their brains aren't even fully developed yet. They don't always exercise good judgement. That's where you come in. It is your responsibility to make sure your child is safe and your child isn't safe if he/she is at a party where there isn't a responsible adult in...

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WHEN TO STAY AND WHEN TO GO

It’s easy to say when to leave a relationship. Leave if you’re being abused physically or if you’re being abused verbally or psychologically and your partner won’t stop or agree to counseling. If your partner cheats on you and refuses to go to counseling, leave. If your partner has any kind of addiction, drugs, alcohol, gambling, Internet porn you don’t agree to, spending money he/she doesn’t have until the family can’t pay bills, and refuses to seek treatment, or sometimes refuses to even admit there’s a problem, you should leave because, unless someone wants to change, and then actively seeks some sort of support to create change like individual counseling, group therapy, AA, NA, or any other identified form of treatment, it’s unlikely they’ll change. Will power is seldom, if ever, enough to create lasting change. If your partner lies to you repeatedly, not white lies but big lies, for example, “I went to work today,” when he/she actually got fired the week before or “I’m going to my mother’s house,” and he/she doesn’t, instead going somewhere else, which they may or may not deny when you confront them, you should leave if there’s either an unwillingness to admit there’s...

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